Dating can be fun and nerve-wracking all at once, as one is still figuring out how to navigate the newness of a relationship and its complexities. While there are no hard-and-fast rules about what is right or wrong, knowing the common mistakes people make when dating is important. Avoiding these can set the stage for a better experience and even give those who are on their first date a chance to score a second one.

1. Checking one’s phone constantly
The best dates involve long and interesting conversations that help people get to know each other. However, the first few dates can also be awkward for many, especially if it is their first date. This might cause one to constantly fidget, avoid eye contact, or compulsively check their phone every other minute. This can send the wrong message to the date and is disrespectful to them. Instead, put the phone away and make an effort to get to know the date better. Avoid checking the phone and attending calls unless one absolutely has to.

2. Talking excessively about exes
A common mistake people make on a  date is talking excessively and negatively about their exes . Talking negatively about other people, especially one’s ex, sours the overall vibe of a date and gives the other person the impression that one has yet to move on. A date, a first one at that, is not the best setting and situation to lament about past relationships.

3. Crossing boundaries
Those  who are about to go on a date should tell each other about the things they will not be okay with during the meeting. Once this communication is established, people must respect each other’s physical and emotional boundaries. One should never have to explain, rationalize, or justify their boundaries to their date. A deliberate violation of boundaries is a massive red flag. To avoid getting into a potentially bad relationship or a second date, people must avoid those who make them feel uncomfortable or judge them for things  that they  are not okay doing or talking about.

4. Dressing shabbily
Not putting in effort to look put together can be off-putting and make it seem like one doesn’t care about the date. One doesn’t have to be over-the-top and wear something too fancy, but small efforts like wearing ironed clothes and putting on a nice perfume can go a long way. 

5. Ignoring red flags
Red flags are ways for one to know that the other person is not compatible and does not share the same value system. The best time to pay attention to such signals is in the first stage of dating. This can help one decide whether they want to move forward and continue meeting the person.

Red flags can be as subtle as interrupting one too many times during a conversation, talking rudely to the wait staff, or being too touchy. Ignoring these signs or trying to justify them will not bode well for one. It is best to walk away when one sees red flags.

6. Asking the wrong questions on a first date
As one may not know much about the person they are about to date, it is best to avoid asking too many personal questions during the meeting. One can ask one’s date about their hobbies, the kind of music they like listening to, or what places they have visited or would like to visit. These questions are great conversation starters and help break the ice.

As much as possible, people should avoid asking why they are single, why they broke up with their ex, or how many people they have dated lately. These questions can be off-putting in the initial few dates and make the other person uncomfortable.

7. Taking a lack of a follow-up text too personally
People may hesitate to call or text their date after their first meeting. In most cases, this may  not  reflect how the date went.  The other person might be shy about approaching one.  If one  hasn’t heard  from their date for a few days, one can always make the first move and check whether they want to meet for a second date.  

That said, if the other person does not respond to one’s text, it is best to leave them alone and not hound them with follow-up texts.

8. Not showing an interest in the other person’s life
Ideally, one must employ all the verbal and non-verbal cues to show as much interest as possible when the other person on a date is talking about themselves. Doing so shows a degree of empathy on the listener’s part and makes the other person feel comfortable sharing aspects of their lives.

9. Being too close-minded and judgemental
Two people on a date may have different views and ways of approaching any situation. Still, it is wise to be open-minded about one’s opinions and not confront them and make them uncomfortable. That said, some people may have vastly different political views and opinions, which one may consider a red flag. In that case, it is best not to take the relationship forward, especially if one feels like it can be a recurring issue.